I'm almost there

This morning started out a bit rough. I had cut back my pain meds thinking I was doing better and didn't need them as often. I was proved wrong when my alarm went off this morning and I tried to sit up. Perhaps my pain meds had actually helped more than I had thought they did. Needless to say, I am taking them again. I met with my plastic surgeon for my post op assessment this morning. Tomorrow will mark the end of my first week with my new soft foobies. I have to admit, I keep touching my new cleavage line. I'm completely amazed at how natural it feels. I had gotten so used to the grand canyon sized valley that separated thing one and thing two that having cleavage at all is exciting.

The girls have come a long way in the past 17 weeks. After the mastectomy my chest was actually sunken in. My sternum potruded out which only emphasized how hollow my chest had become. I was stripped of every last bit of breast tissue which actually extends up towards your collar bones, a lot higher than your breasts themselves. It isn't until you have a mastectomy that you learn just how much of your upper torso is breast tissue. While I never had a big bust to begin with, the change still came as a bit of a shock. Eventually I adjusted and became used to my new, ever changing body. It wasn't long before I had nick named the foobs and began cracking jokes about them often refering to them as "my new bar tricks". I was always proud to talk about the process and show them to others, strangers or not. How will awareness ever be raised in a society that is so quiet when it comes to such an issue?! A woman is still beautiful after a mastectomy. Breasts don't make a women who she is, and a mastectomy shouldn't leave her viewed as damanged, broken or less of a woman.

Over the weeks I slowly went through expansion, watching my body change with every fill and eventually I was so full my chest had become rock solid and uncomfortable. Having nice new memory gel implants are a nice change. They are just so soft! Dr Hagarty noticed that I still have quite a bit of swelling and what looks like a small blood pocket on the right side, which is normal for the amount of work that took place. She explained a bit more of what she did during my exchange and explained why I have the level of pain I am feeling. She said usually the exhange surgery is a lot easier, and recovery isn't too painful. Except my exchange came with a lot of revision which is making my recovery a bit more than I anticipated. Usually it is a quick swap, out with the old and in with the new sort of thing. My right side needed to be moved up over to create an even, natural looking appearance. Women don't normally have one breast in front and the other hanging out over in their armpit haha. These revisions involved a lot of internal suture work to my pec muscles. She wanted to be sure to provide me with the best symmetry she could. She also explained that younger women have a harder time with pain during this recovery because our nerves are more active and fire at a faster rate allowing us to feel more pain. Interesting!!!

Aside from the pain and swelling I am healing beautifully. Dr Hagarty is very pleased with her newest works of art. I caught my nurse staring at them while I sat there topless. She nodded, smiled, and told me that they look great. This is the same nurse that had sent me home in tears without expansion, week after week because my skin was so thin and my body had a hard time healing. It made us all smile to look back and reflect on the journey and how far they have come in the past few months, and just how far I have come. I have grown very attached to everyone in the office. They have all impacted my life in more ways than they will ever know.

I have been given the ok to return back to work next week. I am to mind my 5lb weight limit and stay away from any pushing/pulling/reaching motions as these can damage my healing muscles and tear the very suture lines that are holding my implants in place. Because of the swelling I have to continue to bind myself in the ace bandage over my underwire bra for another week. I will continue to wear an underwire bra 24/7 and follow my list of restrictions for the next 5 weeks until the capsule is fully formed around the implant providing it with the support it needs. I will meet with Dr Hagarty again in 2 weeks to check on my progress. I'm almost there.